You had it all, Coach Sal Alosi. You were the Head Strength and Conditioning Coach for the New York Jets. A position that is the envy of thousands of Exercise Science majors across the nation. There are only 32 positions like it. A strength coach in the N-F-L. The National Football League. The premier organization of the most awesome sport in the United States. You know, the one nation that says, “Fuck you world! We suck at your gay soccer, so we’re going to make up our own shit and dominate!” America, bitches!