My Gift to You: A Recipe for Breakfast

For over two years I have eaten the greatest breakfast dish of all time: a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I am well aware that you can easily take two slabs of white bread, some Peter Pan peanut butter, and some Smuckers jelly, slap it all together and make a delicious sandwich. We have all done it and it satisfied that inate yearning we have for peanut butter and jelly; but, there is another way—a better way. What you are about to receive is the greatest gift that I can possibly give anyone: the recipe for the perfect peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Oh, as a bonus, my take on the sandwich is really good for you, too.

The three key ingredients are FlatOut flatbread, Sugar Free Polaner All-Fruit, and Smuckers Creamy Natural Peanut Butter. Do not substitute these ingredients; they are essential to the balance of flavor that I have carefully perfected over the years.

A Multigrain FlatOut flatbread

Let's start with FlatOut Flatbread. I remember the first time I picked this up while grocery shopping; its flashy packaging immediately grabbed my attention in the deli. The nutritional facts were almost too good to be true and I bought it thinking that I would use it for pizza as the package suggests. My good intentions aside, I absolutely despise cooking, so the pizza never happened—if you happen to make a pizza with FlatOut, let me know how it goes. I did, however, have a craving for peanut butter and jelly one day and had no bread, so I decided to use the FlatOut for the sandwich bread. Holy shit! It was the most wonderful peanut butter and jelly sandwich that I had ever tasted. I spent the next few weeks experimenting with various permutations of peanut butters and jellies until, at last, I came up with the Zenestex Peanut Butter and Jelly Blend that I am giving to you today.

I usually buy the FlatOut Multigrain or the FlatOut Low-Carb versions of the flatbreads. The regular just has too many calories to warrant the purchase (200 per flat bread—double the others). Plus, it doesn't even taste as good as the other versions. You can find FlatOut at Albertson's, Wal-Mart Supercenters, Super Target, or order them from their website.

Smucker's Natural Peanut Butter. The good stuff.

The next ingredient is Smucker's Creamy Natural Peanut Butter. This ingredient takes a little work. All that is in the jar is smashed up peanuts. The peanut oil which, is liquid at room temperature, rises to the top of the jar. Ignore how it looks on the store shelf. There's nothing rotten or gross about it; just give it a stir when you get home and put it in the fridge. The taste may shock you at first—it's just peanuts and salt so there's not that sweetness to it that you get with Peter Pan peanut butter, which is loaded with saturated fat and sugar. You get used to the taste of natural peanut butter real quick and now, honestly, I can't stand “normal” peanut butter. You may be tempted to buy Skippy's so called “Stir-Free” natural peanut butter. Well, don't; it's a scam. Skippy's is just natural flavored since they didn't sweeten it up. They replace the natural peanut oil with palm oil, which is solid at room temperature. If the fat is solid at room temperature, it's generally not good for you and, guess what, palm oil has more saturated fat. Smucker's tastes better and is worth the minute or two of stirring it requires after you buy it.

Sugar-Free Polaner All-Fruit. Aye mi strawberry!

Finally, the Sugar-Free Polaner All-Fruit. I prefer the strawberry flavor, but any flavor jam you desire will do just fine. The jelly is the accent flavor of this sandwich, so you can pretty much go in any direction. I stick with Polaner; it has the most flavor and I love the fruit bits in the jelly—they're the perfect size. In a pinch, you can replace the Polaner All-Fruit with some Sugar Free Smuckers; the flavor of the sandwich will suffer some, but it's still better than any other version of peanut butter and jelly.

The flatbread laid out—dusty side up.

Making the sandwich is quick and easy. There are two sides to a FlatOut flatbread a kind of shiny side and a “dusty side.” I'm guessing the dust is flour, but I've learned not to ask too many questions in my life. Lay the flatbread out, dusty side up. I may not care what the dust is, but I also don't want to think about it while I'm eating. Hide it underneath the peanut butter and jelly.

Slather a heap of peanut butter on one side…

Take roughly two tablespoons of the peanut butter and slather it on one side of the flatbread. I don't measure exactly, I just dip the butter knife in the jar and pull out a glob of peanut butter. After spreading the peanut butter into a flat layer covering about a half of the flatbread, take a tablespoon and pull a nice big spoonful of jelly from the jar. Cover the other half of the flatbread with jelly.

… and a spoonful of jelly on the other.

Now grab the end of the jelly side of the flatbread and start rolling. You want the peanut butter on the outside of the jelly since it is more adhesive and stays together better while eating. If you roll with the jelly on the outside, bring some paper towels—it's a mess. Once you have rolled the sandwich, you are done.

Perfecto! Enjoy!

Now for the damage:

  • Calories: 330
  • Fat: 18.5g
  • Saturated Fat: 2.5g (16g of the good fats!)
  • Carbs: 23g
  • Fiber: 10g
  • Protein: 17g

Eat, drink, be merry, and enjoy life's precious gifts. Merry Christmas!

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